One of the reasons we are always so on top of everything here at Bananama Republic is really because of our vast network of sources and spies. One of those spies had to be in court today and there was a public notice there about the case against us by serial fraud artist Monte Friesner of Pronto Cash and the Panama Saling School. Click that image for the big thing that our fearless source photographed with his phone!
It's a bit cryptic, but what it says is that the court is sending the case file back to the "personera" (a sort of a low level prosecutor) because there is apparently no reason to proceed with it. In other words: This bizarre case with Friesner's fake identities, dead poodles and nude pictures of Russian whores is not going anywhere. It's as dead as the guy he was promoting as his upstanding board member.
But wait! Stop the presses! Wasn't this case already decided? Your editor convicted and awaiting sentencing?
Well, no. Those were just the usual fantasies by Don Winner of the Panama fraud and terrorist promotion Guide. He and his boyfriend Clyde Jenkins claimed that your editor was cowardly hiding abroad (a recurring style figure in Don Winner's reporting about us, and never true) to avoid showing up at some kangaroo trial. While Winner claimed that we were trying to avoid being arrested, in reality your editor was right around the corner of the courthouse that very day, meeting with the press department of the National Police on unrelated matters.
Claims by Don Winner and Clyde Jenkins on expat forums to the effect that the case had already resulted in a conviction are obviously bogus as well, given the fact that the court hasn't deemed the case worthy of any trial at all, based on the file.
So why these stupid lies? Well, first of all because obviously Don Winner and his friends and clients ARE stupid. And then because Winner is in the business of promoting scams and frauds and terrorists by any means necessary, and distributing lies is just one of his tools.
Yet as usual, it isn't ending well for our scam pimp and his clients Monte Friesner and Tatiana Nazarova. Bananama Republic's spies and sources are better and there's more of them. They're legion. They do not forgive. They do not forget. Expect them!