Boscolandia theme park closed

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UPDATED - In a fit of mass psychosis, Panamanians elected television song and dance man Bosco Vallarino to be mayor of Panama City in 2009. A small constitutional obstacle - Bosco was an American citizen and had renounced his Panamanian citizenship - was quickly solved by the National Assembly which re-instated the overweight TV perfumes salesman as a Panamanian national.

Mass psychosis quickly turned into mass revulsion when Bosco the Clown immediately stuck his greasy hands in the municipal cookie jar to pay for a shopping trip to Asia for his wife and friends, and subsequently floated a parade of bizarre ideas for the city, of which "mobile swimming pools" was among the more innocent ones.

Who doesn't remember, for example, how this mental retard planned to have children compete for scholarships by beating each other up in televised free fighting matches?

Meanwhile, he had no clue on how to solve a quickly accelerating garbage problem, traffic congestion and other such real world issues that plague the capital. Instead, orders to produce statues for his Christmas village on the Cinta Costera went to front companies of his friends and allies.

Mafia president Ricardo Martinelli, in his turn, publicly humiliated Bosco as much as he could, with Bosco then invariably choosing the role of the victim.

Whose idea was this Bosco trainwreck to begin with? This, dear reader, was one of those brilliant political brainwaves of Panameñista legislator José Isabel Blandón. The Panameñistas were planning to support the independent candidacy of Dr. Miguel Antonio Bernal but, fearing that indeed a serious person might be in charge of the city - oh, the horror! - Blandón pulled Bosco out of his hat.

Since the alliance between the Panameñistas and Martinelli's Cambio Democratico had broken, il Duce wanted to take over the last Panameñista stronghold in our tiny nation; the Municipality of the capital. A Supreme Court resolution was already in the making, declaring the Assembly's restoration of Bosco's citizenship null and void.

Then, fed up with the delays and speculation, Martinelli summoned Bosco to his palace and told him that he should either resign or be thrown in jail.

Bosco, true to form, put up a heroic fight by calling in sick and resigning the next day. Martinelli left for Colombia to celebrate a free trade agreement there.

So, now everybody is complaining about Martinelli's authoritarianism, as if this was some sort of coup against poor helpless Bosco the Clown. The truth is of course that this idiot should never have been mayor and that this ridiculous show is the result of the stupidity and corruption of our entire political class. But now that they've started to eat each other we want more!

UPDATE: Frenadeso floats the theory that Bosco resigned because Martinelli threatened to reveal a video, filmed by the security agency, apparently proving that Bosco was being paid by real estate swindler and David Murcia associate Alexandre Ventura Nogueira to be the front man in the municipality for various real estate schemes. If true, this would be a bombshell to say the least, because it would mean that this whole circus is in fact a power struggle between Ñamista and Martinelli corruptos.

5 thoughts on “Boscolandia theme park closed

  1. It is really too bad that you and so many others hate and consider Bosco a fool!

    When in Fact he did more for the City of Panama than any one in recent history!

    He was continuously blocked Politically and Monetarily by this Bumbling Criminal Martinelli Government and his CD(Communist Democratic)criminal Party henchmen.

    By the way this statement quoted below and many other statements you foreshortened should include the true facts in this Case that these inter mural activities have been going on for over forty years now, long before Bosco became Mayor

    False statement:(“Who doesn’t remember, for example, how this mental retard planned to have children compete for scholarships by beating each other up in televised free fighting matches?”)

    Pure unadulterated lies, innuendo, and unfounded detrimental inconsistency on your part.

    Bosco was born in Panama!!!

    Bosco and his Family had to flee Panama because of the Dignity Battalions, the crimional PDF and the Felonious despot Noriega!

    Bosco did not personally gain anything from being the Major of Panama City, Except ridicule and hatred for being on the side of the Poor, underprivileged and working people of Panama!

    He continually fought for the children of Panama and Panama City.

    Your complete lack of understanding and the Culture of the Poor, underprivileged and working people of Panama is very evident and very misaligned.

    The Cinta Costera Christmas village was a holiday and multiethnical cultural events for the people especially the poor and underprivileged children of Panama!

    The majority of Children here in Panama unlike your self can not afford expenses trips to amusement parks or Disney style resorts!

    These Christmas village holiday and multiethnical cultural fantasy figures were for the children of Panama, not for a indiscernible Expat like your self!

    The majority of Bosco hopes and dreams for the the Poor, underprivileged and working people of Panama are assuredly lacking in this Bumbling Criminal Martinelli Government and his CD(Communist Democratic)criminal Party.

    The Garbage problem, the water problems, Storm & flood water drainage, problem over the top crime, murder rates problems that have never been properly addressed by this Bumbling Criminal Martinelli Government and his CD(Communist Democratic)criminal Party henchmen.

    So, the only real clown here is you for attacking what you assume is the weakest link!

    It seems you are against or do not agree wholeheartedly with the Criminal Bumbling Martinelli Government.

    When in fact you are really too scare to tell the truth and attack the Bumbling Criminal Martinelli Government!

    I really thought you have more balls and where a straight shooter compared to don the wanker!

    It seems you are dipping into the wankers imperceptible cognitions!

    Here hoping you will be for those who deserve support, not those who are paid as they go for position???

    “Panama where the numbers never add up”

    • Well, Dr. Dias, what can I say? I could take down your delirious statements one by one, but let’s just stick with you saying this:

      By the way this statement quoted below and many other statements you foreshortened should include the true facts in this Case that these inter mural activities have been going on for over forty years now, long before Bosco became Mayor

      False statement:(“Who doesn’t remember, for example, how this mental retard planned to have children compete for scholarships by beating each other up in televised free fighting matches?”)

      Pure unadulterated lies, innuendo, and unfounded detrimental inconsistency on your part.

      Really, Dr. Dias? What a short memory you have, and how fortunate that Bananama Republic’s archives are still intact and functioning! Because, when we published the story about this idiotic plan of Bosco the Clown to have children beat each other up for scholarships – which appalled everyone with half a brain in Panama – YOU commented the following:

      At least he does not use live ammunition and tear gas to unite these poor underprivileged charges?

      By the way Boxing here like Dancing on TV gives the youth here a hope for a future of Poverty and hunger!

      “Panama where the numbers never add up”

      Go see for yourself, here. And now you make a 180 degree turn and go on ranting here about how all of that nonsense was supposedly to help the poor and underprivileged children for the first time in the history of Panama? Your numbers aren’t adding up, Dr. Dias!

  2. Ok, Bosco is gone that’s a fact.

    The other facts that it seems everyone doesn’t mention is:

    #1 No level of past governments be it Panama City or the national level have put infrastructure be it water, trash and so forth of any importance.

    #2 No one ever named to any high level ranking Minister posts, consulate etc you name it, has ever been qualified to hold such a post be it with formal education or proven work experience.

    Bosco was an example of this that got the spotlight more than others for example; Lucy Molinar WTF?

    The list goes on…………

  3. Dr Dias goes off the rails! It is so shockingly out of character that one may be tempted to think that someone has commadeered his account! Wonders never cease.

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