Hooray, Chavez infiltrates Panama

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Chavez memorabilia, soon on Ave. Central

Shit-panic in the right-wing media and American fascist blogosphere: La Critica  (pro-Martinelli rag specializing in gruesome car accidents and cannibal recipes) reported about a secret Colombian intelligence report (probably either from the Stratfor clowns or Maria del Pilar Hurtado, which is sort of the same thing) that a new "guerrilla group" had been "detected" in Panama. They have secret operatives who are recruiting people, oh horror!

Some of these people have been in contact with Panamanian political and social leaders, especially in the province of Darien. In those communities in the Darien, La Palma and Metetí specifically, they contact the people to give them help or guidance in family issues and small business investment. Moreover, they use evangelical churches to enlist supporters. They have used the same methodology in San Miguelito, Arraiján and Chepo (especially in the villages near Lake Bayano), reveals the report.

They suspect these meetings aim to establish pilot groups that will be used as multipliers to recruit people with low incomes and low education, as well as academics with socialist leanings. One of the most visible figures is a South American businessman dedicated to the exportation of coffee and the sales of used cars. He has connections with other businessmen who do frequent transactions in the Colon Free Trade Zone and in Paso Canoas on the border with Costa Rica. On Costa Rican soil they already have a tiny group of collaborators.

So, who are these unknown and sinister guerrillas who recruit people in churches and among the poor? Turns out it's an organization called the Revolutionary Front of Venezuelan Artisans (FRAV). Artisans? Yes. But that doesn't make them less dangerous of course, because they are communists, and being a communist or socialist (right-wingers generally don't know the difference anyway) is a mortal sin punishable by death by Obama-drone!

We think this Chavez infiltration - if there's any truth to this exotic and unsourced bruhaha - is great. Primarily because anything that has to do with Hugo Chavez and the Bolivarian Revolution scares the shit out of the rabiblancos in Panama. Eyes spread wide open in mortal fear. No more Club Unión. They can no longer think or talk coherently. An amazing sight, almost like magic; you say "Chavez" and they instantly go apeshit. Not to mention a large part of the American community here who still think they own the Canal Zone and shiver at the thought of cholos taking their lawnmowers away instead of operating them at 25¢ an hour.

Second, because if the Bolivarian process gains ground in Panama, our political and business class has only itself to blame; its relentless exploitation of the workforce, its looting and stealing, its never-ending corruption, its violence against the indigenous people.

Plus, it would be nice to have a president who has actually read a book or two for a change. Or ministers with actual credentials. Because for all the bragging about "government of entrepreneurs", we can't think of one single politician who has been a director, let alone owner, of any significant international company instead of some local Panamanian (money laundering) outfit.

So, help the FRAV, whomever they are! Give them food and shelter! Spread the word! ¡Viva Bolívar! ¡Viva la revolución! See you next time in the Darién!

2 thoughts on “Hooray, Chavez infiltrates Panama

  1. Primarily because anything that has to do with Hugo Chavez and the Bolivarian Revolution scares the shit out of the rabiblancos in Panama. <—- yeah right Panama is the most capitalist country in the world not even the poor want communism and everyone thats smart knows this

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