Our DigBat commander, Benjamin Colamarco, continues to grab headlines. Now he says that he did not bring any goons while campaigning while he was sick! Fearless terrorist leader Pedro Miguel Gonzalez was at the event too, and is quoted in La Prensa saying that he only brought one gorilla to protect him against American Colombian anti-terrorist bombs.

So now we have mystery goons in the Paitilla Inn whore hotel who steal memory cards and destroy pictures and kidnap journalists (maybe these mystery goons also threw Vanessa Marquez off the 17th floor?).

La Prensa, meanwhile, eventually decided to file complaints. But only with institutions that don't matter: The Defensor del Pueblo (Patria Nueva character, powerless) and the National Journalism Council (group with no balls nor say in anything). Isn't this kidnapping of journalists and destroying evidence an, errrr, criminal thing?

Benjamin Colamarco, the current Minister of Public Works, is a man of tradition. Once a goon, always a goon. The spiritual and organizational father of Noriega's Dignity Battalions is still, in his heart, a batallonero; a street thug with a desire to move up in the world. And so, the Friday before the PRD congress, he wanted to do the rounds to get the votes for the vice-presidency of the Pineapple Party. But, as a Minister, one is of course supposed to go to work. Colamarco then used the old trick of faking a Royoian throat ailment: He was unable to speak, it was really very serious, and he could not possibly be expected to show up at work.

Then he went to a breakfast meeting with the terrorist leader of the National Assembly and the delegates of the PRD from the Dariën in hotel - where else - Plaza Paitilla Inn. But there was also a photographer from La Prensa, Ana Teresa Rentería. and, knowing that the fearless Comandante Colamarco was supposed to be very, very, ill and in bed, she took pictures of him being miraculously cured and enjoying his meeting.

Soon, the goons showed up. Men in suits with bulbs under their arms. They demanded the pictures. The photographer refused. Arguing back and forth. Eventually La Prensa caved in and ordered the digital images erased. But that wasn't enough to release Mrs. Rentería, who was a sort of kept hostage for hours at the Paitilla Inn. The story can be read in today's La Prensa, but what did La Prensa DO about it? Sued the government for millions of dollars? Filed a complaint for illegal acts by Comandante Colamarco and his goons? Well, dear reader, La Prensa did absolutely nothing at all. It's a PRD paper, remember? They haven't cared about press freedom since the 2004 campaign.

Meanwhile, Comandante Colamarco is said to become the Piñadista candidate for mayor of Panama City. Voting for him sends a clear message. The message is that you're crazy and you want some dictatorship nutcase to rule the city.

Once upon a time, the good people of the far and cold Kingdom of the Netherlands were glued to their TV screens and ran for the morning papers to get the latest on the spectacular kidnapping of Freddie Heineken, the beer tycoon. The kidnappers were caught, some of the ransom money found, and Heineken and his driver unharmed.

Most of the kidnappers continued their criminal careers once released. Money was invested in the Amsterdam Red Light District, one kidnapper was shot and, it turns out, his half brother Martin Erkamps, also one of the kidnappers, lives and works in Panama! Writes La Prensa:

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Says Daniel Delgado Diamante, Comandante Minister of Government and Justice: The FARC statement threatening that the captured guerrillos should be released or else, is false. So he doesn't want to comment. And that they say there is an agreement to "live and let live" with the FARC in Panama is not true either.

Is he speaking the truth? After the Chavez/payments screw-up, who knows?

Let's put it this way: Why is the FARC in Panama - they have a camp near the border in the Dariën - basically left alone if there is no silent agreement? And if the FARC communique is false and not important, why was an internet café in La Chorrera raided the other day from where the statement was reportedly distributed?